3) Marriage and Faith
Unequal yoke, marriage between believers, and building a Christian family
Faith is not just one aspect of marriage: it must be the foundation upon which the entire relationship is built. In this lesson, we will examine the importance of spiritual compatibility and how to build a truly Christian family.
The Principle of Equal Yoke
What does it mean 'do not be unequally yoked'?
Show answer
Answer: Do not enter into deep commitments with unbelievers
2 Corinthians 6:14: "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"
The image is of two animals of different sizes or strengths trying to pull the same plow; it does not work. Similarly, a believer and an unbeliever have fundamentally different values, priorities, and destinies.
What was the result of Solomon's marriage to foreign women?
Show answer
Answer: His wives turned his heart toward other gods
1 Kings 11:3-4: "And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart. For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father."
Solomon, the wisest man in the world, was led astray by marriage to women who did not share his faith. If it happened to him, it can happen to anyone.
“Only in Christ can a marriage alliance be safely formed.” — Ellen G. White, The Ministry of Healing, MH 358.3.
Why Sharing Faith Matters
Can two people walk together if they do not agree?
Show answer
Answer: No, it is impossible to walk together without agreement
Amos 3:3: "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"
Marriage is a lifelong journey. Spouses need to agree on the most important matters: How will we raise our children? What will we do with our money? How will we spend the Sabbath? Where will we go when we die?
What fellowship has light with darkness?
Show answer
Answer: There is no fellowship between light and darkness
2 Corinthians 6:14: "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"
What If I Am Already Married to an Unbeliever?
What does Paul instruct those already married to an unbeliever?
Show answer
Answer: If the unbelieving spouse consents to stay, do not leave
1 Corinthians 7:12-13: "But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him."
If you converted after marriage, you should not abandon your unbelieving spouse. On the contrary, your Christian life may be the means of his/her salvation.
How can a wife win over her unbelieving husband?
Show answer
Answer: By her chaste and respectful conduct, without words
1 Peter 3:1-2: "Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear."
“Show him in your life the advantage of taking Christ at His word.” — Ellen G. White, Testimonies on Sexual Behavior, Adultery, and Divorce, TSB 51.1
Building a Christian Home
What should be the statement of every Christian family?
Show answer
Answer: 'As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord'
Joshua 24:15: "And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD."
The commitment to serve the Lord should be a family decision, led by parents and embraced by all family members.
How should parents transmit faith to their children?
Show answer
Answer: Impress God's words upon them in all situations of life
Deuteronomy 6:6-7: "And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up."
Religious education is not a weekly event, but a lifestyle. The truths of God should be taught “sitting in your home, walking along the way, lying down and rising up.”
What happened in the jailer's household when he believed in Jesus?
Show answer
Answer: The promise reached his household, which also heard the Word and rejoiced in God
Acts 16:31-34: "And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house. And they spake unto him the word of the Lord, and to all that were in his house. And he took them the same hour of the night, and washed their stripes; and was baptized, he and all his, straightway. And when he had brought them into his house, he set meat before them, and rejoiced, believing in God with all his house."
Acts 16 shows an important truth for the spiritual life of the family: when the jailer believed, he carried the message into his home. The promise reached him, and his household also heard the Word and rejoiced in God. Faith should not remain restricted to the individual; it should touch the whole home.
“Fathers and mothers, make the hour of worship intensely interesting.” — Ellen G. White, Testimonies for the Church, vol. 7, 7T 43.3
And Now?
Practical applications for building a Christian family:
- Singles: Commit to marry “only in the Lord”; do not yield to pressure or loneliness.
- Married to believers: Cultivate faith together through family worship, prayer, and study.
- Married to unbelievers: Live the gospel with love and patience, without forcing conversions.
- Parents: Make spiritual education a daily priority, not just weekly.
- Everyone: Declare with Joshua: “As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”
My Decision
I commit to placing God at the center of my family. If single, I decide to marry only someone who shares my faith. If married, I will dedicate time to worshiping God as a family and passing faith to future generations.